jokes of the week

A man faintd @d front of mr.biggs n in no time pple were gathered round him & a lady suggestd mke una give am water,d man opened his eyes n said,comot frm here if i wnt water i 4 go faint 4 water board.

  

A plane with 5 passengers was about to crash in midair and therewere only 4 parachutes.
1st passenger, Lionel Messi: I'm d
world's best footballer, my fans
still need me. He takes one and
jumps
2nd passenger, Aliko Dangote:
I'mAfrica'srichest man. I don't
want to die now He takes another
one and jumps.
3rd passenger, Goodluck
Jonathan: I'm the President of
Nigeria, the most powerful and
intelligent President in Africa. I
have Boko and Subsidy issues to
deal with He takes one and jumps.
4th passenger was d Pope, Pope
said to d 5th passenger, an 8 yr
old girl "I'm anold
man, I'll sacrifice my life for Urs "
but d girlreplied "no need for dat
there are 2 parachutes left.
"how can that be?" asked Pope.
The girl replied "The Nigerian
President took my school bag

A grandma and her
grandson were
shopping in a
supermarket. The
grandma realise that the
kid has picked a toy, she
calls out; "Degree, put
that toy back". The kid
returned the toy back.
Astonishly, another
customer asks; is that
his name? The grandma
replies; yes, I sent his
mother to the
UNIVERSITY to study
but this is what she
brought back.